A Weeping Christian: When Faith and Grief Collide

A blog by Kimberly Crumby

Cemetery Decor…Seriously?

I have the hardest time, and I do mean hardest, figuring out what to take to Hannah Grace’s marker. It’s kind of like what we discovered during the funeral planning- funerals are meant for those who have lived nice, long lives. They had to special order a casket… the guest books were all for older people (featuring lots of doves, ocean scenes, etc.)… the flowers in the book screamed “adult”. It’s quite the same scenario when you go to the cemetery and see all the sprays, wreaths, flowers, etc. None of them seem right for a four year old- and that’s the way it should be. It is totally wrong and abnormal for a four year old to have to be buried. So, the beginning of this month saw me wandering around Hobby Lobby trying to figure out what to get. And then, I saw these huge, glittery purple Christmas lights- they reminded me so much of something she would have liked. I picked up a purple one… on the day James and I were going out to the cemetery, we made a stop at a different HL location. That one had a pink light- perfect. We found some shiny tinsel to wrap around all of it. After we got it all fixed up and walked back to the car, I looked out at the expanse of stones and markers. I actually laughed through my tears at how hers was definitely noticeable with all its pink and purple glory. That’s how it should be- she was four… she was a pinkalicious princess… she was perfectly ornery…. she was our sweet pea.


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6 thoughts on “Cemetery Decor…Seriously?

  • Bonnie says:

    Heartbreaking And beautiful.

  • Jenny says:

    I just can’t imagine. I remember at one point you said that other people (who haven’t been through it) really shouldn’t try to imagine the pain because they just really can’t. My heart aches for you. Whenever I hear that song that says there is “joy in the morning,” I always think it’s “joy in the mourning” instead, and I think this is a great example of that. I pray God gives you lots of extra moments of unexpected joy and laughter, and that He gives you comfort and peace that makes no sense to anyone but Himself.

    • You have a good memory, Jenny! I still believe that one… it is very easy to let our minds become consumed with what it might feel like if… if I lost my husband… my child… if someone I loved had a life-changing injury… because those things happen all around us. I’ve just decided that it’s pointless to spend time imagining it- b/c you just can’t until you live it. Love the “joy in the mourning”- and how you said that God gives us comfort and peace that definitely don’t make sense. It does seem inconceivable that we can go on sometimes… even with joy… and then we definitely know that our ways are not his… not even close. Thank you, sweet sister.

  • I love it. She was really looking down and smiling. The Lord is our Rock. Hang on.